I have a problem.
It’s nothing serious.
At least, that’s what I think.
I can’t seem to be interested in something for an extended period of time.
I’m curious about a lot of things. I still want to learn programming languages (it’s literally a matter of sitting down and taking the time to go over the courses that I bought for myself). I’m beginning to become less and less interested in portrait photography. I’m going back to landscapes.
Maybe it’s because I don’t have a foundation to work with.
I can sit here and tell you a total of zero photographers that I admire. Not that because I don’t admire any. It’s because I don’t know their names. Theory? I don’t know anything about that either. I just pick my camera and shoot. That’s basically it. I might direct a bit, I might consider the focus, the angle, but that’s about it.
It was the same thing with my bass guitar — I jumped into it and practiced nonstop for a few months. Got to playing in a band, then by college, it was collecting dust in my room. I eventually sold it (and I miss it terribly, but when am I going to play it?) to a jazz musician.
I am surprised, however, that I haven’t given up on learning Spanish. I have an objective — it’s to be fluent by December 2018. I can hold a very short and basic conversation in Spanish. I think that’s pretty good for learning on my own for four months. (I keep telling myself that, but my tutor didn’t think so).
That’s right! I hired a tutor to help me with Spanish. She add some structure to my loose style of learning. Thank goodness, too, because some verbs trip me up.
I’ve also hired a coach to teach me boxing. Boxing is tough. I have yet to hold the fundamentals down, but I’m getting there. A good base is important to build on, and that’s something I’ve learned too late in life.
I wish I had taken the time to learn the basics and retain it — for the piano, for French, for literary theory — but I was too focused on progressing to the next level and not really caring about a good foundation. No wonder I get frustrated when I can’t seem to become better (because I lack good form or I’m missing something basic from my learnings).
I’m beginning to lose interest in my hobbies.
I’ve been very tired lately.
My last run, besides today, was about two weeks ago. It’s hard to get out of bed at 5am. Maybe I’m sleep deprived. (I know for sure I am after last weekend.)
I’d like to get nine hours of continuous sleep for once!